TJIC: Dude, can you loan me a ten? I had cash in my pocket earlier today, but…

DFF: But…?

TJIC: I spent it on burritos!

And not just that one Sunday night, either!

(NSFW)

How’s your Monday been so far? Has it been calm and quiet? Well, fuck that.

The absolutely zany clip was directed by John Hillcoat, who helmed last year’s apocalyptic thriller The Road– but don’t be mistaken: that movie and this video have very little in common. A short list of crazy shit that appears: a statue that cries blood, a wolfman, the vampire-looking cheerleader that adorns the cover of the “Heathen Child” single, Cave and his Grinderman compatriots shooting lasers and destroying civilizations, and a fair bit of NSFW nudity (including from the Grinderman members themselves). And more than one visual similarity to Hot Chip’s “I Feel Better” video.

(SFW audio-only here, but you’ll miss the insanity)

DOVER, N.H. (AP) – After nearly 400 years in the same family, a New Hampshire vegetable and fruit farm is up for sale.

The growth of supermarket chains and pick-it-yourself farms, plus the heavy workload, have made Lucy and Will Tuttle decide to sell their 134-acre farm in Dover. The brother and sister are the 11th generation of Tuttles.

Then, I too, could assume the moral and/or intellectual advantage conferred by living in something older than the State of Texas.

(there’s probably another joke to be made here, about Tuttle’s records not showing Buttle’s heart condition, but I’m not caffeinated enough to come up with it)

Israeli soldiers train for the inevitable Israeli/Palestinian dance-off.

(if it turns out to be a useful diplomatic technique, it may be in use for a long time)

OMFG!

MUST try this.

(damn. storefinder reports no hits within 50 miles)

Cool!

I somehow had never seen/heard this before – it’s very soothing.

Via Dan Savage’s blog at The Stranger, some clever chappie (I don’t know who) has declared May 20, 2010 “Everybody Draw Mohammad Day,” in support of Matt Stone and Trey Parker and in opposition to religious thuggery. Why May 20? I haven’t a clue, though it could have something to do with Otto ascending the throne of Greece. Or, more likely, King Sancho IV of Castile’s founding of the Study of General Schools of Alcalá.

I will be employing my tremendous skill as an illustrator, of course, and expect that my colleagues will do the same. If they refuse, they will be declared weak-kneed, namby-pamby, quisling infidels and will be shamed on this blog (Though such idle threats rarely work these days; perhaps I could threaten them with a painful death, which seems to do the trick). If readers would like to show their solidarity, please email your Mohammad masterpieces to me here: mmoynihan at reason.com. The best ones will be published on Hit & Run, which, along with the concomitant death threat, is reward enough.

I think I’ll doodle something.

Insha’Allah, of course. ;-)

UPDATE:

Ann Althouse thinks this is a bad idea, but I think she misses the point, which is merely this:

I’m totally fascinated by Ray Kurzweil, whom I’ve met, and The Singularity. The unity of man and machine. #whatdoyouthink My Best, Bill

Damn!

(alternate post title: GET A LIFE, will you people? I mean, for crying out loud, it’s just a TV show!)

So what was the major breakthrough announced by Obama at the end of the two-day conference? That Ukraine, Chile, Mexico and Canada will be getting rid of various amounts of enriched uranium.

What a relief. I don’t know about you, but I lie awake nights worrying about Canadian uranium. I know these people. I grew up there. You have no idea what they’re capable of doing. If Sidney Crosby hadn’t scored that goal to win the Olympic gold medal, there’s no telling what might have ensued.

Remember – one of the things that makes Canadians so very dangerous is that they look just like us.

With Cars as Meth Labs, Evidence Litters Roads

Law enforcement officials in several states say that addicts and dealers have become expert at making methamphetamine on the move, often in their cars, and they discard their garbage and chemical byproducts as they go, in an effort to destroy evidence and evade the police.

Just as some states had reported progress in stamping out home-based meth labs, this transportable process has presented a new challenge: 65 percent of meth lab seizures in Tennessee, for instance, are now the one-pot, or “shake-and-bake,” variety. The number of meth labs seized in Oklahoma last year increased to 743 from 148 just four years ago, largely because of the prevalence of moving labs. In Indiana, the state police reported that meth lab seizures rose nearly 27 percent from 2008 to 2009.

The authorities say that the mobile method has grown in popularity because it is easier, cheaper and harder to get caught than making it indoors, and that most of the cooks are addicts themselves, not dealers or distributors.

One two-liter bottle might produce about eight grams of meth, enough for the cook to share with his “smurfers” — friends or fellow users who make the rounds at stores, each buying small enough amounts of the main chemical ingredients to stay below the radar of law enforcement, often while meth is being made in the back seat.

“We are so under water on this thing,” he said.

This process sounds only slightly more inconvenient for junkies than roadside vending machines would be. I guess forcing consumers to submit to a body cavity search in order to buy cold medicine has proved to be totally worth it!

Thanks, government!

Life has become “awful” for Phil Jones. Just a few months ago, he was a man with an enviable reputation: the head of the Climate Research Unit (CRU) at the University of East Anglia in Norwich, England, an expert in his field and the father of an alarming global temperature curve that apparently showed how the Earth was heating up as a result of anthropogenic global warming.

Those days are now gone.

Nowadays, Jones, who is at the center of the “Climategate” affair involving hacked CRU emails, needs medication to fall sleep. He feels a constant tightness in his chest. He takes beta-blockers to help him get through the day. He is gaunt and his skin is pallid. He is 57, but he looks much older. He was at the center of a research scandal that hit him as unexpectedly as a rear-end collision on the highway.

His days are now shaped by investigative commissions at the university and in the British Parliament. He sits on his chair at the hearings, looking miserable, sometimes even trembling. The Internet is full of derisive remarks about him, as well as insults and death threats. “We know where you live,” his detractors taunt.

Jones is finished: emotionally, physically and professionally. He has contemplated suicide several times recently, and he says that one of the only things that have kept him from doing it is the desire to watch his five-year-old granddaughter grow up.

Awwwwwwwwwwwwww, poor guy! And all he wanted to do was save destroy civilization!

Oh, Cambridge. Really?

(depending on how it came out, I may post some video later)